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“Aww shit, we’re out of mayo,” I moaned, rifling through the condiments in the fridge door.Jeff grabbed his dick out of his shorts and held it out like a squirtgun. “I got your mayo right here.”“Gross. You do not.”On this particular Friday, my buddy Jeff and I were making dinner at his place. Just burgers, nothing fancy. We were more than buddies, actually, although we were certainly that: we hung out regularly, and did guy stuff together like play tennis, watch TV, and such. But we also did … well, guy stuff: like giving each other blowjobs whenever the mood hit. Not too long ago we had added anal sex, and even kissing, to our sexual repertoire. It’s not like we’d declared ourselves an exclusive couple or anything – we even still talked about women we’d like to get with – but the intensity level of our sex was on an upward trajectory.Anyway, we hadn’t seen each other for a few days. We were both just out of college and starting new careers that kept us busy during the week, so we didn’t have as much time together as we had in the previous semen-soaked summer. As I was cooking the burgers, both of us sipping on beers, Jeff persisted with his little mayo joke: otele gelen escort “hey, you love this stuff. What’s it matter if it’s on a burger? It’ll be a good substitute.” He grinned ever more widely, continuing, “creamy, tangy, salty. White.”“Eew. That’s nasty.”“What? They’re really very similar. In fact, it’s entirely possible mayo is actually just factory workers’ jizz in a jar.““That is entirely possible,” I agreed with a laugh. “But you won’t make enough.”“Oh yes I will. I haven’t had time to jack off all week.”“That’s nice, but still don’t want it on my burger. Why waste it like that?”“What’s the big deal? I’ve cum inside your buns before,” he quipped.”Well, that much is true.”“Hey, instead of getting my cum all over your glutes, I’m going to get it all over your gluten. Hahaha.”“Nuh-uh.” I stood firm. “No jizzburger.”It was my turn to crack a joke. “So is this what people mean when they cook a nice meal for you and they say, ‘the magic ingredient is love?’” Jeff’s face looked more serious. “God I hope not. That’s what my uncle George says about his barbeque.”“Red or Carolina style?”Now balgat escort it was his turn to say, “eew.”“Honey mustard?”“Okay, now that’s just gross.”“Ohhh, I get it,” I mused, driving the punchline home. “It’s Alabama white, isn’t it?”He blanched fully at that one, holding up his hands as if to abandon the topic.But before he could speak I snuck one more in. Laughing out loud, I added, “that’s not horseradish, it’s George-relish!””Okay,, okay. You’ve made your point. No jizzburgers. And I don’t know if I can go to his cookouts ever again.“ The patties were done, so I scooped them off the pan and dropped them on their buns – without cum! – to cool. “How about a jizz dog, then? ” he asked, gripping his cock. Through all this banter, he had never bothered to put that thing back in his shorts, leaving it hanging above the waistband, hardening in the open air. It flailed around every time he laughed. Not that I minded. Quite the opposite: I couldn’t take my eyes off it, and finally decided dinner could wait a couple minutes, but I couldn’t.“You’ve got extra sauce in there tonight, huh?” I asked, getting elvankent escort on my knees. “Yeah. So a sausage is more up your alley?””It’s only going in my mouth here. Nothing is going up my alley in the kitchen.”I gave him a quickie blowjob right there in front of the stove, and he hadn’t been kidding. After less than a minute he filled my mouth with one of his biggest loads ever – and I swear he came for longer than that. It might well have been enough to substitute for the missing mayo. Not that I could stomach the idea. Fortunately it all happened so quickly our burgers were still nice and warm as we sat down to eat them, along with a third beer each.As we were dropping our dishes in the sink he gave me a playful look, grabbed a bottle of chocolate syrup out of the cupboard, pulled down my shorts and squirted some on my cock. “Huh. Guess I want a banana split for dessert,” he said, getting on his knees to lick me clean. “Maybe I’m the one who wants a banana split,” I said, slapping myself on the butt.Neither of us was clean, so once he’d licked the syrup off my rod and sucked the remainder of it out of my pubes, we ran to the shower and jumped in together. After we’d gotten the temperature right and starting washing each other, something we liked to do occasionally, I ventured, “Uh Sorry, all that beer is getting to me. I’ve gotta hop out and leak.”“Hey, don’t worry about it. There’s a drain right there.”“What? You’re just saying that because you gotta go too and you don’t want to wait for me.”